Ticking items off the list

Got a  bunch of yucky paperwork items off my to-do list, some of them urgent, and it wasn't so bad. So happy to have gotten up off my ass!!! Next week I'm going to start to tackle taxes, oh joy. I'm not leaving it to the last minute.

 

I've been sick this past week with a cold but I still did some fast-paced walking up and down some hills outside since it's been so nice. Didn't make me feel any worse.  Down a pound this week.

 

Lately, one thing I did notice food-wise was my portion size on meats and fats was increasing. Am reining that in! I figure I can have all the raw or steamed veggies I want (no white potatoes) but when it comes to avocados, meats and some fruits, like dates, I have to be careful.

 

Have been lurking around reading other blogs... learning how to be consistent and strong and how not to do things so I don't wind up like a trainwreck and how not to make excuses up the wazoo.

Procrastination

I’ve been a lazy ass. With most everything else in my life especially paperwork, my attitude has been “Why do it today when I can do it tomorrow?” Time for a change in thinking. I’ve already done a time-management course in the past but this goes deeper than that.

Working with a counsellor has been helpful in determining why I’ve been avoiding doing paperwork and other things on my ‘to-do’ list. For me the big trigger has been stress and anxiety: fears of being judged and doubting myself. Also some relationship and related issues have come up. Solutions proposed: for starters, a strict schedule for sleep and exercise.  Some exercises to change my negative thinking.

Feeling lousy has led to my ass being parked on the couch for a few evenings this past week. I’ve not been exercising as much as I should.  Basic walking and carrying groceries from the store to home is not enough.

Food-wise I’ve done pretty well. Mostly eating clean. A few bites of bread in there, but otherwise I’m surprised I’ve been able to keep on track. I’ve not gained any weight… I've got to stay off the couch!

Still here

I’ve been taking an Internet break for the past while. Almost two months. I noticed that I’d been spending waaaaaaaaaay too many evening hours on the computer. I’d look up and it’d be 11pm, meaning at least four hours online. Yes at least four. I told myself “I’m doing valuable research by looking up info on nutrition, recipes and exercise” but really, I was fooling myself.  I’d get up from the couch and feel like crap and hobble off to a bad night’s sleep. SO NOT GOOD!  I know I was using the Interwebs  was a way to escape and procrastinate and not get essential  stuff done like exercise, food prep, keeping my place tidy by doing chores, doing my taxes, ect. I lost focus and avoided lots of stuff, including friends. I've now limited myself to one hour max online for personal stuff and no more.

Last month, I started going to counseling sessions to understand what is with the major procrastination and other issues.  I’ve always battled low-level procrastination. But I’m thinking maybe the death of my father stirred up my emotional crap again.  I don’t know yet, but it was and is really affecting my life in a big way. At least I’m figuring it out.

Food intake had not been consistent, i.e. skipping breakfast a lot. Then overeating at suppertime. Also four big cheats in the past two months. One was my birthday, but I think I should be able to have a fancy dessert once a year. However the other three cheats were big dirty fatty high-caloried restaurant cheats.  I know that certain things triggered this and I was eating my emotions big-time.

Regarding exercise, have stuck with doing the morning walk and that’s it. I know I need to do way more to shrink.

As for where I am weight-wise: I went up to 199lbs but now back at 193-195. 

Past couple of weeks have been on point. My focus is back somewhat, but I'm eating clean, moving my fat ass and getting things done.