Thursday, 18 December 2014

Weighing-in and Holiday Blogging Break

Eating well hasn't been hard, but temptations are getting more tempting all the time. They're everywhere in the office, I mean everywhere man!  However, it doesn't mean I have to put any of those treats in my mouth.  Weight on Wednesday:  Down to 168.5 lbs.  I'm staying true to my pledge not to gain over the holidays.  If I can stay at this same weight or a little lower once the holidays are over, I'll be very satisfied. 

I'll be taking a blogging break until Wednesday January 7th. I'm feeling a bit like Eeyore these days... and I don't like that much.  Exercise has helped so much to lift my grey clouds, and I hope to strap on my skates soon.  Perhaps my trip back home and a good talk with my mother will bring some peace, love and lightness.  

I'm wishing you readers who stop by all good things, and more :) Happy Holidaze! 

Leaving you with a favourite tune of mine by the Vince Guaraldi Trio:

Sunday, 14 December 2014

Between a Rock and a Hard Place

I wasn't able to post as I usually do mid-week as a big snowstorm came rolling  through here and I spent a couple of my evenings shovelling snow.  After I was done, I chose a warm shower to rinse off the sweat, soothe sore muscles and then sleep instead of posting.

Blue Sky! A small break in the clouds
Another challenging issue is my computer, my rapidly ageing computer with its unsupported browsers. Although I am reading blogs, sometimes when I try to comment, the interwebz swallow the comments into the abyss.  I'll likely be using the computer at the office or the library as an alternative until I can buy a new computer after the holidays.  I'll do some research online but I just can't face an electronics store right now to test products; they are so crazy busy right now.

Weight on Wednesday: 169.8 lbs


Emotionally right now I'm facing some heartbreak.  I'm not going to go into details, but I'm having a tough time.  The reason why I mention it at all is to show how I am breaking the cycle of emotional eating.  

After a deluge of of work at the office, stress on the home-front, heartbreak and physical fatigue from shovelling, I was feeling just so tired of everything.  Five years ago, I would have most definitely soothed myself with food: ordered in a couple of pizzas, wings and fries and gorged over the course of the weekend.  

This time, when I came home and sat for a few moments on the couch, my thoughts strayed briefly to ordering in pizza and I had this little conversation with myself:

JUST STOP. STOP AND THINK.  What do you really want?
-To feel better yes of course, but ain't happening right now.  I can only focus on doing what is best for me. 

AND WHAT IS THE BEST FOOD?  It ain't two pizzas over two days is it?
-No. Only if I want to go back to being over 220lbs.

EASY CHOICE THEN?
-Yes. 

After that I got up, looked in my fridge, found eggs, green peppers, mushrooms and some lactose-free Swiss cheese and made myself an omelette. And truly felt so much better afterwards for making that choice.

What is important to me is to always have healthy choices available in the kitchen. If I didn't happen to have have eggs and veggies on hand, I do have a freezer with a few soups, a couple of portions of Moroccan chicken stew, some chili, and some frozen veggies.


With the holidays, both at work and at parties, the massive amount of food temptations are a bit overwhelming right now. I don't want to isolate myself by skipping out of all activities, but food centered activities I'm not participating in any. Like the cookie exchange and cookie competition at work. I'll be at my desk. I do not want to put myself into a difficult food situation on purpose.  What I can do is take it day by day, situation by situation, moment by moment, choice by choice.  Making the right choices.  And leaving parties early if need be.

I pledge not to gain weight over the holidays.  Last year, from American Thanksgiving to the Orthodox Christmas I lost 5lbs with the January Jeans Club.  I'm re-reading Marion's archived January Jeans posts from last year at Affection for Fitness to keep motivated.  Come January 1st, I will not have any regrets about my choices.

Wednesday, 3 December 2014

Blahs

Feeling kinda blah these past couple of days. I do know why partly, but the rest of the blahs is a mystery. With my mood and the freaky weather I've only been able to get outdoors and exercise a few times, however my main workouts are going to shift to the indoors i.e. my basement where the elliptical is acting as a clothes line right now.  I started yesterday morning with a few old-style exercises to get my heart pumping: jumping jacks and push-ups. I forgot how killer push-ups are.  I'm starting slowly...
Feeling out of sorts is no excuse for slacking and falling into a bag of chips.  I've been eating well, but once again I noticed my portion sizes creeping up...  not exactly  sure why my stomach is making me think I'm hungrier than usual. Likely emotional and added stress. And I started to have a cup of coffee in the afternoons in addition to my morning cup... not a good habit for me. I'll switch to decaf or tea.

The other day, I did try an experiment with using ground bison to bake a Tourtière rather than pork. It turned out really delicious! Will have to tinker a bit with the seasonings but I think it'll be a permanent change.

Weight this week is 171.3lbs. 

Saturday, 29 November 2014

Back in the Saddle

And it feels good to shake off the sickness. Being back at work this week for a few days was exhausting: lots of things to do!

At home as well there are so very many items on my various "To Do" lists. Although my man was able to hold down the fort and keep pots from boiling over, I'm slowly getting back to my responsibilities and chores.
Once the urgent stuff is taken care of, then I'll turn my mind to Christmas and buying gifts, decorating and baking a few Tourtières (French-Canadian meat pie) for upcoming pot-lucks

In the meantime, I still have to take things easy with exercise but that's not an excuse. I'm getting my doggies rollin'... Crack that whip, Rawhide!

Wednesday, 19 November 2014

With a Little Help from my Friends...

... I'm getting by. I've had such nice people stopping by with low-sodium high-veggie soups (potato-leek, onion with duck fat, carrot and pear, squash and sweet potato, minestrone and chicken noodle), deviled eggs, egg-salad sandwiches, roasted chicken and veggie casseroles... wow, such great friends.  It was also so nice to see such lovely comments from you all out there in the blogosphere; it really warmed my heart :)

My man is also more helpful these days, but not as a cook. He calls himself a sandwich-master and microwave jockey. He's been keeping busy with laundry, cleaning and  shoveling snow. We had our first big snowfall of the season, which usually happens mid to late November.

Unfortunately this recovery is taking longer than I thought, but the worst of the pneumonia is over. I'm still on strong meds and have been taking things slowly. I get dizzy a lot of the time, so slow is okay! I've also received advice from friends about eating immune boosting foods, taking various supplements and products. I think for me it was just bad timing... picking up a sinus infection which slowed me down, then picking up pneumonia, likely at the Dr.'s office or hospital, and that knocked me out. I haven't been this ill since I was a child, when I caught everything under the sun as children do. 

This time of year also is sad and difficult as it's the 2nd anniversary of my father's sudden death. Last year, we visited the grave; this year I could not go outside. It's been too cold and my lung can't take it.  I had to honour his memory a little differently by looking at pictures of the good times we shared, remembering our reflective talks and peaceful canoe excursions at the cottage that he built, and feeling that grief, not as sharp and breath-catchingly painful as it once was, but grief nonetheless.  My mother still has a hard time, of course, and I wish I could help her, ease her pain somehow... but she has made progress from last year when she had difficulty seeing a future for herself.

I did weigh myself because I was concerned about some bloating, my lack of activity and not tracking anything. I'm at 172.2 lbs,  so pretty much where I've been for the past while, in the low 170s.  It's reassuring that I haven't gained but for right now, I'll just concentrate on getting well and back to my old self again. 

Friday, 14 November 2014

Everything all at Once

Sometimes you go through periods when everything happens all at once and it's like that now for me.  I'm still sick, but with pneumonia now. So lots of drugs, rest and all the rest. Feeling lousy and it hurts to breathe. Tracking weight is not a priority, so I haven't weighed in. 

Thankfully I have a great man taking care of me and some great friends who have stopped by with some homemade soups. My stockpile of soup in my freezer ran out last week and I'm not a fan of the high-sodium low-veggie canned stuff. Once I feel better and am on the mend, then I'll get back to my old routines. 

Wednesday, 5 November 2014

Quickie Update

Another day left on antibiotics, hooray! I am shaking the sinus infection and feeling better than last week, but this is week three of the yuckiness and feeling meh.  Just started commenting on blogs again... got a lot of catching up to do online!
Still sticking with what works: lots of liquids, rest, some exercise, eating well and probiotics.
Weight is up by about a pound to 171.6 lbs.

Wednesday, 29 October 2014

Sicko

Not feeling my best these days, I was thinking it was just a little cold that wouldn't go away. But no, it's a bacterial sinus infection. Yuck! So I'm on antibiotics and taking every kind of measure to get better and to minimise the drug's side-effects:

  • Lactose-free probiotics. There is a brand that is readily available in my neck of the woods that carries a choice of fermented rice or soy. 
  • Drinking lots of liquids like water, water with lemon, seltzer and the occasional juice. I feel like it's about to pour out of my ears, but I know it's good for me. 
  • Eating a bit less than usual since I don't have much appetite: scrambled eggs, sweet potatoes and lots of soups like chicken soup, onion, carrot & leek, squash&carrot. It's easy when I've already got a little stockpile in the freezer. Plus I'm getting lots of good vitamin C from natural sources.
  • Exercise. No reason to stop moving except some fatigue. Walking in the morning but not briskly, well-off my pace but still moving. Pilates and yoga in the evening. I'd rather curl up on the couch and watch some cartoons but that's my old fat girl's excuse. 
  • Rest. Getting a good night's sleep is essential. I do wake up to blow my nose but usually go right back to sleep. If I have trouble, I just listen to a short podcast or some soothing music and I fall asleep within 10 minutes.
Weight-wise I'm about the same, 170.7 lbs.

Wednesday, 22 October 2014

Long Sad Day and Wednesday Weigh-In

Getting this out of the way first... weighed in this morning as is my usual and the results: 170.5 lbs.  A 1/2 lb less than last week.  

It's been a very long day, a terribly sad day.  An incident on Monday where a soldier was killed surprised a lot of us and we had been told security levels had been raised from low to medium. Now today, a soldier was gunned down not a 10 minute walk away from work.  My heart really goes out to the families, this is so tragic.  Fellow Canadians killing Canadians is just a shock.

The office was on lock down all day, meaning no one could leave.  This was the first time we've faced this kind of emergency so everyone had varying levels of stress.  People reacted in very different ways:
  • Some urged chocolate and comfort eating. 
  • Some were generous enough to pool healthy lunch items for those who had planned to go out to a restaurant so didn't have any food to eat. There is no cafeteria in the workplace only vending machines.
  • Some used gentle humour to diffuse tension. 
  • A few were afraid and crying. 
  • A few were angry. 
  • And one colleague in particular spewed the most racist and hateful remarks I've ever heard, ever.  From past experience, I know there is no reasoning with this woman. She's been previously warned about her inappropriate behaviour. 
I just kept faith in the RCMP and local police and knowing that they were doing all they could to get the situation resolved.  

A few nice things happened today: 
  • Most of us bonded together and helped one another through the long day. 
  • The weather was nice enough so that when we were finally allowed to leave, walking an extra 30 minutes to get to public transportation was an easy walk. 
  • A reward of a SweeTango apple (Honeycrisp hybrid) was all the indulgence I needed on a day like today
  • Many loved ones and friends sent messages to ask if I was okay.
Off to take a bath and then to bed; it's been a long day. Take care out there folks.

Wednesday, 15 October 2014

Unexpected Thanksgiving Challenges

Going to stay in an environment where I have no control over the food in the house is tough. I was surprised at the amount of junk food in the family home.  My mom has regained 30lbs of the weight she lost.  We had a good talk and it's basically she went back to eating convenient and fast food like pizza, Chinese (the deep-fried stuff, not authentic) and pasta.  

She's been having some health challenges, fibromyalgia is the main one, and the pain and fatigue has thrown for a loop lately.  Her pain interfered with her exercise classes and sometimes even walking 15 minutes is too much.  Playing into this is also the emotional... it's been almost two years since my father passed away and where she is in her grieving process she does not say.  She admitted to turning back to using food for comfort.  Sigh... yes, like mother like daughter.  At least she did have lots of fruit and veggies stocked, so she hasn't fallen too far.  I gave her my advice, but just being there for her, listening without judgment, and leading by example are the best things I can do.

Leaves floating on the Lake

Although I tried to keep on my feet and active, there was a lot of sitting and talking with relatives.  And sitting and more sitting. I volunteered to help do whatever chores or setting the table, ect., when I could just to keep moving. My man and I did get out for a walk and luckily enough it was a nice day.


As for my weight post-Thanksgiving, I'm up slightly to 171.0 lbs.  Was expecting a bigger gain but I'm just fine with .4 lbs given all the salty ham I ate!  Really I did keep my portions small, filled up on veggies and fruit, didn't drink too much alcohol and for dessert only had a slice of apple pie.  Yes, just the one :)  

For improvement this week: Hydration! At work, the water fountain is out of order so it's a trek to get to the nearest one. Not a trek really, more like the opening to that old TV show "Get Smart"! At home on weekends, it just seems that I forget. Solution: Carrying a 1 litre refillable water bottle wherever I go. And refill at least once during the day.

Tuesday, 7 October 2014

Pre-Thanksgiving Weigh-In

With all the activity and preparations in the next few days before Thanksgiving, I figured I'd post now.  So pre-Thanksgiving weight is 170.6 lbs, so slightly less than last week.  No big loss, but a loss nevertheless.  Although I'm happy that the scale is moving in the right direction, I know I still have a ways to go. Not to undervalue coming from over 220 lbs, the reality is I am still not near to  where I'd like to be.

Fall colours while walking on the weekend
Thanksgiving could be a good excuse to go off the rails and fall face first into a bowl of ice cream. That won't happen in my world, but what could is less activity than usual on account of travelling, spending time with relatives and just being out of my routine.  With brisk walking, I can do that pretty much anywhere. There will be tons of chores to do so I'll try and keep busy, on my feet and away from the cushy living room sofa.

As for food, that can be a mixed bag. As I've mentioned before, some relatives equate food with love and if you reject the food you are essentially rejecting them. It has gotten a lot better over the last few years, but this is always a concern.  

The menu for the various suppers usually is a roast beast of some sort, carby fixings, gravy and vegetables. My man does not follow the same eating style as I do, so he usually has no problem with any glutinous carbs that cross his path. But we both have issues with the desserts. The past few years, my Mother has retired her recipe for pecan pie (a.k.a. the devil's pie LOL) in favour of apple pie so I'm hoping the trend continues. I'll likely have one slice, one :)

Wednesday, 1 October 2014

Wednesday Weigh-In

We've really had the most beautiful Indian Summer that I can remember and the leaves are turning all sorts of pretty colours. The sun is setting earlier and earlier. The other evening I went out to do some gardening after supper and it was already dark at 7:30pm! Time really flies.

Starting to slowly change from spring/summer clothes to fall/winter clothes. I tried a couple of nice sweaters and a pair jeans that I had packed away a few years ago that were too small and they now fit. Very happy about that! 

Next step is the clothing store. I've been avoiding it because I don't have much time (or much money) lately to try on outfits and shop, but... it's come to a point where I've got to get a few new work basics: Blazer, cardigan, a couple of new blouses, dress pants, dark denims. One thing I've learned is to ALWAYS try things on. Every time. I find more and more odd variations in clothing. How can jeans in the same brand, same size, same style but a different colour can fit so differently? Just odd. 

Balancing work and getting my own stuff down has become more challenging. The work days are filled with meetings, appointments and other demands so no time for nice leisurely lunchtime walks with colleagues. I did a few quick solo walks around the building to at least get a bit of fresh air and the blood pumping :)

Down this week to 171.1 lbs, a couple more pounds gone. Some weeks, like last week, can be difficult but I'm learning that a bad week is not the end of the world. 

Friday, 26 September 2014

Giveaway Winner

Thank you for your giveaway comments! The lucky winner of a copy of Sean Anderson's book Transformation Road as chosen by the Random Number Generator is... 

LuckyMama at A Long Weigh Away Congrats! So she's is actually very lucky after all :) If you haven't read her blog, please do stop by. She's also lost a lot of extra pounds this year, so double-congrats to her!! 

In answer to the question "If you were to be a cast away all alone on a deserted island which record would you choose to have with you?

LuckyMama answered: I'm a Queen freak - all of it, but I'd probably take Innuendo.
BUT, there's a new artist I found - small at the moment - named George Ezra. Young fellow too, but I'm loving his voice!

If you don't know about George Ezra he's English and recently released his first album called Wanted on Voyage. He has a distinct voice and writes catchy folk melodies. It should be interesting to see how his career evolves.   


My choice is... well, it took a while to decide. Here was my thinking on narrowing down the list:

The Beatles or The Rolling Stones? 
Oliver Jones or Oscar Peterson? 
Mozart or Beethoven? 
Joni Mitchell or Carole King? 
John Coltrane or Miles Davis? 
Alanis Morrisette or Tori Amos? 
Leonard Cohen or Bob Dylan? 
Radiohead or U2? 
Bessie Smith or Robert Johnson? 
PJ Harvey or Bjork? 
Missy Elliott or Beastie Boys? ... yeah it goes on and on...

In the end, I had to chose what over time has stayed with me the most on a personal level:

Kate Bush's album Hounds of Love.  In particular, I've listened to the song Running Up that Hill so many times since discovering her catalogue of music and it speaks to me on so many levels. Mostly relationship-wise,  but also when facing any challenge and of course weight-wise. The version I've linked to is the remixed version she performed at the 2012 Olympics in London. 

Wednesday, 24 September 2014

Lady Business and Weighing In

Riding the lady hormone roller coaster. Not a fun ride this week. So emotional this time. This was the first time I've cried over a commercial on TV. Just want to wear yoga pants, a hoodie and a knit cap (to keep the bad hair days at bay) and hide away watching Pride and Prejudice (Colin Firth edition). Did this affect weight loss?  Yeah I chose to let it. Bad choice. Not going to blame anything or anyone else but me.

In terms of exercise, I wasn't pushing myself at all. Although I did my workouts, morning pilates DVD and weekend and after work walks, I was just going through the motions. Rather than finding little ways of being active through the day, I just coasted. No stretches at my desk. No extra going up and down the stairs at work or at home. I certainly could have directed those crazy hormonal emotions into working it hard, but I chose the easy way out.

In terms of food consumption, although I ate all the right things, I ate more than I should have. Examples: extra helpings of roasted sweet potatoes, bigger portions of meat, more guacamole, more sunflower seed butter on apple slices... those extra calories add up quicker than one thinks!

Weigh-in: 175.5 lbs. Up 2.2 lbs from last week.  It was a nice run of small losses week after week, and this is the first gain in a while. Even before I stepped on the scale this morning, I could feel the bloat and I just don't like how it makes me feel.  Will work hard this coming week to get back into action.

How? I'm going to change things up. I'm going back to my 30 minute morning brisk walks before work since the ragweed pollen is almost gone. I find it's so much easier and requires less concentration to just walk quickly. I'll still do my after work walk to unwind about 30+ minutes, and also go back to doing the workout DVDs either before or after supper rather than in the morning. 

Didn't fall too far down the rabbit hole this time. But I can sure see how I could wind up there and back to being over 220 lbs if I choose to keep making the same bad decisions. Won't happen next week. I choose not to let that happen.


PS: My little giveaway closes tomorrow, so if you haven't entered you can here

Wednesday, 17 September 2014

Giveaway and that Wednesday Scale Thing

Having received a free extra copy of Sean Anderson's book Transformation Road : My Trip to Over 500 Pounds and Back, I've decided to pass it along to a lucky reader. 
Sean felt that he was tardy in sending out the copy of his book that I bought, so he added another signed copy in the mail. How nice is that? When I received it a couple of weeks ago I thought how can I return this favour? I figure the best way to pay him back is to pay it forward.

This is not a how-to lose weight book, rather a very honest chronicle of Sean's history with morbid obesity. Some passages were hard to read, especially the ones where he details the effects on his family. He writes with his authentic voice and if you've ever read his blog, it's that same honest writing you'll find in this book.

All you have to do is answer the following question in the Comments on this post:  

If you were to be a cast away all alone on a deserted island (with an iPod of course, ha ha!) which record would you choose to have with you?

I'm such a music lover and supporter of local musicians, I'm having a hard time answering this question! I'll give my answer with the winner's name next Friday September 26th.

  • The winner will be chosen by a random number generator
  • Entries close on Thursday 25 September 2014 at 11pm /EST
  • I'll send the book to wherever in the world the winner is located, even the South Pole :)
Since I'm a small blogger and am not doing any promotion to try to get a larger following, the chances of winning are good.

Other news, since it's Weigh-in Wednesday, I'm at 173.3 lbs. Slightly less than last week.